Spouse on board?

How many of you had/are having trouble convincing your spouse/significant other that it is reasonable to buy a Model S?

If there are objections, what are they? Money? Perceived practicality? Cost comparison to an equivalent ICE (as if there really were such a thing...)?

My wife is not enthusiastic, but she has slowly accepted the fact that I'm buying one. I even caught her on the Design Studio once looking at different colors :) So I think she's decided to enjoy it since it is pretty much inevitable.

As demonstrates, you don't have to make back all the money; just the difference between the S' cost and that of your most probable alternative.

My wife is not on board. She was not at all swayed by the Get Amped test drive ;) She is not a car person and basically wants the cheapest thing that runs and will get her from point A to B.

It's not just the cost (although that is a big deal; this is triple what we've ever spent on a car before), it's more the social implications of having an expensive car. We have been fortunate in life, so we can afford it. But we aren't "luxury car" people and we don't generally live in a way that would suggest to others that we have a lot of money. Owning a Tesla basically says "I make more money than you" to most of her friends (mine are more on the techie side so they think it's awesome).

But aside from the simple cost, she is particularly uncomfortable since she works for a non-profit in international aid, developing countries, and poverty issues. We just returned from a year and a half living in Cambodia, and this car is worth more than most of the people there will make in 25 years. It just makes her feel kind of gross. (I for some reason don't have such a strong reaction. ;) )

At the end of the day, I could make an executive decision (our savings are mostly from my salary) and go for it over her misgivings. But for now I am deferring. (I just got my "Time to build" email the other day, P6329!) She'll be getting a new job next summer, and so our new situation will determine whether it's the right thing to do or not.

@chrissam42: If her friends would judge her for the car she drives vs. what she does with her life, are they really her friends?

I'm sure she has a heart of gold - too bad that often comes with a lot of baggage in the form of baseless guilt.

Best of luck.

Mine thought it was a silly idea, but I made her come on the test drive. Although that didn't change her mind about the car itself, she saw my ear to ear grin for 2 solid hours after the test drive she can't imagine depriving me of that happiness! :-)

+1 @chrissam42 "We just returned from a year and a half living in Cambodia, and this car is worth more than most of the people there will make in 25 years"

Thanks for sharing this perspective. As amazing and beautiful as this car is, it's good to remember that there are much more important and valuable things in this world. I admire your willingness to defer the order - and I hope that you both get the chance to enjoy the car in the future!

@chrissam42 +1
Thanks for the perspective. I do believe that it is good for those who have resources to fund movement in technology that will facilitate everyone on earth living at the US level of comfort and convinence. If the US moves to electric vehicles, powered by Solar, there will be more Hydrocarbon available for the rest of the world to bootstrap themselves with. Advancing battery technology is a good thing for everyone. IMO, those with money should work to aide those without, and one way to do so is to fund technology advances that have the chance to improve the life of everyone.

@tesla.mrspaghet "If her friends would judge her for the car she drives vs. what she does with her life, are they really her friends?"

True, if people are that petty we don't really want to waste our time on them. I don't think she honestly believes our friends would actually judge us. I think it's more fear of the initial reaction. Like one good friend of ours, when I told her I had a reservation, said, "Oh, wow, you must be loaded." She's not going to fundamentally change her opinion of us, but there may be a subtle readjustment of how they see you.

I think it all boils down to fear of the unknown. We've never bought something this expensive before, and it's a big step.

I believe that people will treat you based on how you live, and not what you own. After all, we're still going to use this fancy car to drive to the supermarket and go have a beer at the bar like everyone else :D

Okay, we can go back to talking about our wives now!

Response: "Not any more!"

I can tell you that it was a much easier sell when I thought that the maintenance costs were going to be so much lower. Now, instead of contributing to the economic cost/benefit, it works in the wrong direction.

My most expensive car was a new PT Cruiser so from my perspective this is an insanely expensive car. So it helps to be insane when purchasing it. Shortly after I put down my $5,000 deposit Tesla invited me to visit the factory to get a ride. I still clearly remember asking my wife if she would like to fly across the country from Florida to California for a test ride. Her incredulous stare said it all, but she elaborated with, “Are you nuts?! You want to fly across cross country for a 2 minute ride?!!” Well, I might be nuts, but thinking fast I said, “But dear I thought we could turn it into a romantic get away to wine country.” Fortunately, my wife happens to have a weakness for California wine country and her response was something like, “Well why didn’t you say so I’ll take care of the reservations and we’re going to take a full week and we’re doing the Napa Valley Wine Train.”

When we got to the Fremont factory we were treated like royalty. The factory was decorated to the hilt and the style definitely was a hit for my wife to put it mildly. The whole experience was so cool and exciting that my wife starting to become infected with the same insanity bug that I was afflicted with. The rest of the week in wine country was the icing on the cake and I who previously hated visiting California had a great time especially on the wine train.

After that the insanity progressively got worse for both of us. I founded the Florida Tesla Motors Club, went from considering a 40 kWh battery to 60 to 85 kWh, from General Production to Signature, from Standard Signature to Performance Signature. All during that transition from insane to seriously insane my wife’s reaction was something like “good idea dear”.

One day while visiting friends, who also have a Model S reservation, they said they needed to fly out to California to get one of the first test drives before configuring their car. They asked us if we wanted to accompany them. We said sure and how about a week in wine county and a trip on the wine train? Sure! Off we went again! When we got to Fremont I got a call from Tesla informing me that my number came up on the Signature waiting list! So we got our own test drive. What a blast! This was the first of the test drivea before Tesla was compelled to put electronic governors on the cars. We flew around the test route at close to 100 mph like, well…like crazy people! By this time we were all rabid, foaming at the mouth crazy people.

So no, at this point my wife has absolutely no problem with me getting a fully optioned Model S. A day or so ago we received our delivery window from Tesla and she’s already planning the delivery party!! We frankly don’t know whether getting a Model S is a saving us any money. We just think of it as a contribution to a worthy cause. We’re saving the world and we’re gonna have a hellava time doing it. We’re not getting any younger you know and this ain’t no dress rehearsal mind as well go for it!


Took her to the test drive... sat her on the back... she now misses the car more than me :)

It makes my new wife nervous, both in the cost aspect and the "you live in a modest house in a modest neighborhood but you drive a 60k car?" aspect...

...but she got sick of me talking about reserving one so she got me a reservation herself, which she gifted to me about 2 hours before we got married.

Going for our first test drive a week from Monday, curious to see how she reacts.

@archibald: I've never heard of anyone who was disappointed with a test drive :)

My wife is very supportive, but I've been wavering and recent developments really have given me second thoughts. The 60KWh battery I've been pondering will essentially cost me $4K more than I thought ($2K for maintenance, $2K for the supercharger access I was counting on).

She still says "If you want it, get it." But the purchase has grown difficult to justify. We live in Northern California, where power is pretty expensive, and solar isn't a great option for us.

Where I once had a "have your cake and eat it too" attitude about the Model S (amazing car, no dependence on oil, and the "teslanomics" mean it's a bargain), I now have to admit that it won't be as much of a bargain as I'd hoped.

Still...I'm leaning toward making a reservation, but now need to figure out if I should just pony up the extra $8K for the 85Kwh battery

With the 85, you're at home on the SC network. With the 60, you're a barely tolerated visitor.


As I've opined in other threads, if you can afford the 85kwh, it's a no-brainer.

I drive a 1999 Honda Accord which is the most expensive car I have ever owned. My wife has had 3 cars since I bought it. I told my wife about the Tesla last year and that I wanted to sign up for a Model S. She looked at the website and thought it was "interesting but really expensive". Before I sent the check we drove up to Newport Beach store. Once she saw the store and talked to staff she was at the point where "if you want to do this you can." She did remind me to never give her crap about buying shoes again! (she is a shoe junkie.) I sent in the $5k.

Then the beta cars came to Newport so up we go again. She started to get a bit more excited. Now I had a new problem. She really liked the Signature red color. She bought her first Tesla shirt. She starts saying "you should get that Signature red car color". Now my insanity meter starts going off. That is more than 3 times what I have ever spent on a car. OK, so I am in this deep. She wants Sig red (so do I) so I will upgrade to the Sig. How many pairs of shoes is this going to cost me? I guess this will be known as my mid life crisis.

Now I have created a monster. She is buying Tesla clothes to fit the grand babies. Now I am being told "if I am going to spend this much on a car it has to be able to haul grand kids around so it has to have the kids seats. That's the deal." Somehow it went back to if "I" am spending this much on a car. Go figure. What happened to the Honda guy who just wanted to sign up for a production model?

So now it's my turn. I went back to her last month and said; Look. I am in this deep. I am up to 90k plus on a car which for both of us is insane. So why get one of the most progressive, limited edition cars on the market and then cheap out at the very end and not get the Signature performance? Go big or go home! So now she is banking on it being too late to change the order. It wasn't so I upgraded again. We went back to Newport Beach to let her drive the car for the first time (performance model). Needless to say she was impressed. Now her story is since her commute is longer than mine she should drive the Tesla to save on gas. I hope my Honda has a few more years in it. :)


In the same boat, Oaktowner

My wife feel totally confortable in a 2006 Mazda 3 with 110,000 km. So when I "announced" to her I reserved the Model S, I received everything but a warm welcome.

Expecially since the Canadian pricing, maintenance, supercharger and soon to be announced connectivity package and storage options increased the price tremendously. This will likely be 12-15K more than anticipated... I'm reconsidering it myself now


A couple of weeks later, we met with a neighbour at our cottage saying that she misses her husband that died at age 54 a year before. When she left the house, my wife told me, go buy your Tesla we've got one life to live. Decisions, decisions!


"Now my insanity meter starts going off."

Yeah, there's a lot of that going around with these Teslas. ;-)

But I think sanity is greatly overrated.



For me, no problem... It came down to two choices...

1) Rent an apartment closer to my work, and come home on the weekends.


2) Buy a Model S, and come home every night (unless I am out of the state).

Even though the apartment would have been somewhat cheaper in the beginning, getting the Model S was highly advised by my wife!

Bought my wife the equivilant value diamond ring...
Just kidding... For now :))

Thanks Larry,

If the planets line up the wait should be over in less than a month. What I failed to mention is now my wife is on the Model X list. Tesla should hire me as a sales person. I am better at sales than I thought. :)

No problem with mine. She gave me a reservation for my birthday. Since then she has put up with my obsessing over this website.

@Brian H. True -- and, as has been pointed out in other threads, the utility of the 60 KWh battery as a long distance driving machine might be marginal at best, anyway.

@mrspaghet -- I guess it comes down to how I define "afford." I know I could either come up with the cash or make the payment, and if my house were paid off and all three college funds were filled (in other words, if I really had the cash to burn), it would be a no brainer. But as it is, the 60 is seeming less and less attractive, meaning I have to get used to the idea that I will be spending 80K on this car.

I'm still leaning toward doing it, it's just become a larger pill to swallow!

I'm like petero. I did such a good job of selling my wife, she has claimed it for her own. Says she needs the California HOV stickers more than I do. I had to get a second reservation. Hers (S#705) arrives this Thursday! I am P5000 something, if we save enough on gas to pay for it.


1) He died sane, driving his Mazda.
2) He died insane, driving his Tesla.

Pick one!


I'm like you Pat, minus all the support from the wife. I would buy nothing but Honda's and now my first American car EVER will be the Model S. Can I afford this car, questionable. Can I mentally afford not to buy it, most certainly no, I can't afford mentally not to buy this car... :) Almost sounds like the priceless Visa commercials.

Down Payment for a Model S P: $5,000
Down Payment difference to Sig: $35,000
Balance to purchase the Model S: ~$70,000

The thrill, passion, environment responsibility and satisfaction?


"How many of you had/are having trouble convincing your spouse/significant other that it is reasonable to buy a Model S?"

Whoever said it has to be reasonable?

Spouses. All spouses consider themselves the guardians of all that is reasonable.

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